Symbols of Division

“For the first time in my adult life, I am really proud of my country because it feels like hope is finally making a comeback.”

When I first heard Michelle Obama say these words in February 2008, I was taken aback.  If I’m being completely honest, I was a little angry about it.  I didn’t realize at the time that my privilege was being confronted.  I knew that this nation was far from perfect, but the idea that someone could find nothing to be proud about was something I was not equipped to hear at the time.  I’m a work in progress.

Nine years later, I’ve learned a lot about the different lenses through which we all view the American experience.  I’ve learned that, for many, those lenses genuinely make it hard to be proud of the state of our Union.  And, because of that, the same symbols a hetero white male like myself see as unifying (or at least innocuous) take on a much darker meaning to those for whom our imperfect nation has been neither kind nor just.

From confederate monuments to sports mascots to the national anthem, symbols have been much on our mind of late.  And I think its worth a moment for us all to consider just what symbolism is.  In my very best 3rd grade English, it’s “using a thing to represent an idea”.  But who owns the idea and who infuses it into the thing?  And how does that change over time?

Take the swastika, the most recognizable and notorious symbol of the 20th century.  Do you think the Nazis invented it?  Ancient civilizations from India to Greece used the swastika as a symbol of strength and divinity.  Today, we view it in the context of the Third Reich and the Holocaust.  Many pagan symbols were co-opted by the early Christian church as a way to absorb those cultures under an expanding Roman empire.  The bottom line is, things change.  No symbolic meaning is immutable.  The good can be corrupted and the corrupt can be redeemed by events large and small.  

The passage of time isn’t the only reason for differing perspectives on the meaning of a symbol.  Life experience in the shadow of a symbol can impart wholly different meanings on the same icon.  Imagine every morning a big red truck drove down your street.  If you lived on the right side of the street, people came out of the truck and hosed you down and beat you.  If you lived on the left side, different people came out and handed you food.  I imagine the symbolism of a red truck would inspire both hope and fear, depending on what side you were on.  

We can have opposite and equally valid reactions to a symbol.  And allowing you your reaction does not detract from mine (because the thing is not the idea).  A reaction that you didn’t expect or consider is an opportunity to learn and see things from a different lens and become an ally.  To grow.

So if you can accept the idea that symbolism changes over time and can be drastically different, based on your own experience, then there is no sacrilege in asking “what is it you are trying to promote here?” and “would another symbol promote the same thing without the mixed messages?”  Our values, our truth, come from inside.  We can love our nation and still face its faults.  We can hold something dear and still respect someone else who sees it differently.  We can be proud and still understand why someone else finds it extremely hard to be.  Ideas matter more than things and people matter more than ideas.  Choose people.  We have to get past the flash point of our personal outrage and get to the conversation that matters.  

No, "Whiteness" is Not Under Attack

...White Privilege is.

The White Supremacist march and Heather Heyer's murder ripped the bandage off a still-open wound in America:  racial hate.  The backlash against anyone that equivocated on the issue, up to and including our president, was immediate and clarion-clear.  No.  Just, no.  But, with almost Newtonian precision, the equal and opposite reaction inevitably came.

There is a small, but insistent counterpoint in America that asserts that "Whiteness" is under attack.  First of all, I'm not sure, and never have been, what "Whiteness" is supposed to entail.  But I do see the very real pinpoint pressure that is inevitably penetrating the white bubble.  And that is being met with strong resistance among many who don't want that bubble popped.

This article is for the ones in their bubbles.  From a white man who had his popped and lived to tell the tale.  My message: stop fighting it.

If I had to define "Whiteness" I suppose I would have to use the word naiveté.  Our history and heroes are carefully disinfected and sanitized to remove any of the warts of reality or controversy.  Our holidays and patriotic remembrances are purged of any burden of conscience.  And our systems are inoculated with isolated examples of transformation, just enough to let us off the hook.  And, sustained by this cocktail, we can walk through life with rose-colored glasses, completely blind to the much larger and more complex reality of the American fabric.

I've always struggled with my German heritage.  My family came to the US well before WWII and my grandparents served in the US Armed Forces during the war.  As an Army brat, I was raised in Germany on an American base, an army of occupation still, in a 2,000 year-old city surrounded by relics both ancient and modern.  I learned that Germans had not erased their national shame, but confronted it and placed it centrally in their culture, so to never repeat it.  It didn't make me proud, exactly.  More like determined.  

Then I moved back to the states.  And, for the first time in my life, I was relentlessly tormented as a "Nazi".  There was no explaining to these people that (a) I was an American, (b) came from a multi-generational family who served in the American military (c) modern Germans are more determinedly anti-fascist than they could conceive.  They wouldn't hear it.  I retreated socially and kept my head down until we were tapped to move to our next base.  I didn't realize it at the time, but I'd just had my first brush with "otherness".  

I don't tell you this to evoke your sympathy or to ingratiate myself to any person or group.  I say it because what I learned was the importance of confronting one's history head-on.  Of owning it.  Of realizing that it is beyond my power to take back from the pages of history, but it is my duty to both carry it forward and make sure those lessons are not forgotten or re-lived.

That's where American "whiteness" fails us all.  Instead of confronting and coming to terms with our history and its very real ongoing impacts to people of color, we sink into our bubbles.  We deny, deflect, and "whatabout" with ridiculous statements like "all lives matter" and - the absolute worst - "political correctness."  When you don't treat a wound, it festers.  It gets infected.  And your problems multiply beyond the point where the original wound is no longer even recognizable.

My white friends who are struggling with this often say "I shouldn't have to keep apologizing for something I never did!"  Yet they continue to celebrate their white-sanitized version of America, not realizing that their continued denial is, in itself, doing damage.  Let me explain something.  People of color don't want Bob Smith to apologize for the sins of your ancestors.  They want Bob Smith to acknowledge that those things happened and still happen today.  They want Bob Smith to be an ally.  When you wake up.  When you pop the bubble.  When you SHOW UP in support for people that are still struggling against institutional and cultural racism and acknowledge it for what it is, that whole "apologize for my ancestors" thing goes away.  Take it from a German.

Is the President a Racist?

SPOILER ALERT:  No, I truly don't think so.  But that shouldn't make you feel any better.

I'll get more to the president in a moment.  But first, let's lay a few things out there.

First, there's a big difference between the political spectrum of ideologies and actual legitimate political parties.  Let's have the sophistication to separate the two.  Not all ultra-conservative (reactionary) ideologies are related to (or welcome in) the Republican Party, just as not all ultra left-wing ideologies are related to (or welcome in) the Democrat party.  Sovereign Citizens, anarchists, eco-terrorists, Marxists, and other fringe ideologies do not have a foothold in either party.  Just because someone is classified as "far left" or "far right" in ideology doesn't merit legitimate actors and parties being pasted and smeared with their acts or words (Anybody who does is lying to and manipulating you and should not be trusted.)

Extremists on either end of the political spectrum are fundamentalists, with binary values (I'm right, and everyone else is wrong), and prone to violent expression (whether physical or just in rhetoric).  The "conventional" political spectrum, in which the Republican and Democrat parties operate are, in effect, the moderate middle (I know that's hard to believe).  Because, no matter how much we disagree, we all believe that participation in the processes and institutions of our Constitutional Democracy is the way to effect change.

Second, you either operate within the political apparatus (parties, PACs, votes) or outside of it.  There are people who have extreme ideologies who operate inside the apparatus, and those people tarnish anybody or any organization that suffers them.  David Duke espouses ideologies (white supremacy) that are FAR outside any party platform, but is tolerated within Republican circles.  That brings into legitimate question how tolerant the Republican Party is of such attitudes.  Conversely, there are moderate groups with mainstream ideology and sentiments that are not directly involved in party politics.  Non-profits, advocacy groups, churches: these are all examples of institutions that share certain ideologies but don't operate primarily in the political machine.

Recapping:  You can be an extremist insider or a moderate outsider or any combination of them.  It's important to understand where players are on the spectrum.

Third, let's be clear about the difference between violent political ideologies and incidents of opportunistic violence.  A march by the non-violent and social justice #BlackLivesMatter movement that is co-opted by hooligans and thugs is not the equivalent of anarchists or white supremacists harming people and property as a vehicle for their ideology.

Thanks for your patience.  Now to the matter at hand.

I do not believe the president is a racist.  That's no vindication; I actually believe that his inability to empathize with other human beings makes racism basically irrelevant to understanding him.  But he's the president, and he's accountable for the environment and people around him.  And that's where we get to the root of the current situation.  I said before that fringe groups are basically binary; so is the president (albeit for different reasons).  And therein lie the inescapable parallels and attraction between the two.

The president has inarguably surrounded himself with racists and advocates of racist (and generally hostile toward all marginalized groups) policies.  Bannon, Miller, Gorka, and Sessions have clear records and agendas.  No sugar coating it: they're straight-up racists.  There haven't been so many race-hostile people in the executive branch in decades, and that makes a clear statement.  He can't possibly distance himself from racism philosophically when he can't distance himself physically.

And then there's the president's policy agenda, starting, most significantly with his absolute determination to erase everything about this nation's first black president.  There is nothing that white nationalists want more than to eradicate Barack Obama's legacy from the annals of American history.  It's easily thrown off as pettiness (and to him it probably is), but make no mistake, this is a bright neon sign to those fringe so-called "alt-right" elements.  His "victims of Obamacare" charade is like a guestbook of aggrieved whiteness.

Simultaneously, in his "win or lose" brain, the president has bought in to key elements of the white nationalist "America under attack" mantra.  That is, immigrants from Central and South America, and Middle Eastern Muslims.  And he has laid down aggressive policy agendas to "fight back" against these false threats.  Again, he's gone so far as to create "victims lists" and "undesirable" lists and published them.  These policies are precisely the sort of "victories" that politically-minded fringes are looking for.

So, if he's not a racist (according to me, anyway) why won't he denounce, by name, the white supremacists who support him?

Those who have examined the president most closely describe him has having an insatiable need to be adored.  That's why he loves the rallies so much.  It's why he also constantly speaks in superlatives.  That hole will never be filled, no matter how much money he makes, how many buildings bear his name, or how many votes he gets.  It will never be enough.  Many have posited that the president might be a "useful idiot" to Putin.  That has yet to be proven.  But, undoubtedly, he is being used as a vehicle for white nationalist/supremacist ideologues, in return for their adoration.

The president is binary, win/lose.  And right now, he's losing.  His popularity is historically, stunningly low.  Who's sticking with him, though?  The nationalists.  He can't let go; that would be admitting defeat.  He's trapped, both by his own psychosis and the team he put around him.  But those nationalists are also operating freely and openly through the edges (but definitely inside) of the Republican political apparatus (see Iowa Congressman, Steve King, for example).  They've been quietly, distastefully tolerated, because they bring votes and money.  They have a seat at the table, even though nobody will admit they invited them.  And that's the ugly elephant in the room for Republicans (no pun intended).

Bottom Line:

There is no place for hate or violence in America in 2017.  The First Amendment gives you the right to spew this garbage, fine.  I served to defend that right.  But let's not kid ourselves.  It doesn't belong here.  And nobody who espouses hate or violence, for any reason in any form, should have a welcome seat in any mainstream political group.

Any reasonable, semi-informed person (let alone seasoned political operative) should be able to distinguish between extremist and mainstream ideology.  Likewise everyone should be able to distinguish between politically-motivated violence and opportunistic rage.  And if you can recognize it, you can tell the difference between righteous condemnation and ridiculous smear tactics.

It should be easy, therefore, to reject and condemn extremism and violence, no matter what your party affiliation or ideology.  Nobody should think for a moment that rejecting white supremacists should have any political implication.  But when the rats are in your midst, it gets a lot harder to deal with the traps.

Untargeted: Why We're Wrong About Everyone

As part of an ongoing series exploring privilege and my journey to shedding it, I offer this first installment, a baseline if you will for taking a step toward understanding. Ironically, I see this first step as acknowledging that it's impossible.  And, oddly, how that's a very good thing. 

Of course, all this is merely a wandering exploration of my own understanding.  Renowned sociologists will probably pick me apart.  But that's okay.  

Humans are the strangest of creatures.  We are studies in contradiction.  We draw much of our identity from the groups we inhabit: cultural, professional, societal, and familial, among others.  And, as members of a group, if part of its collective identity is attacked, we cleave to it more strongly to protect our own.  Even "anti-groups" like the Punk Rock movement drew and aligned their identity to the collective.  Having an "us" is the ultimate survival mechanism.  

However, flip that scenario and assume that I, as a member of a group, am DEFINED by the group, and I will, almost reflexively, reject that assumption.  "You don't know me!" I'll say.  And it's true.  Although I'm a (proud) veteran, assuming that I hold certain attitudes or beliefs based on that one fact will provoke a reaction.  Nobody likes to be pigeon-holed.  

Rashida Jones

My statistics teacher taught me something that always stuck with me.  He said "all models are wrong; some are useful."  As a tool for achieving insight, models are incredibly valuable when looking at large groups.  But modelers know that their product is "precisely wrong."  We know that our population lies within +/- 3% of whatever we are stating.  But nobody is an "exact fit."  Now, as I constantly work to unravel my preconceived filters and biases, I realize that this rule is true in a hundred different ways at the same time.  None of us are exactly anything, but simultaneously ALMOST dozens of things.  Which of them is in the proverbial driver's seat at any given time is subject to change, and often a product of our environment.  

So, no matter how much we study, no matter how much we learn, we'll never be right about anyone.  Some see this as a reason to throw their hands up.  But I think it's the basis for a really profound understanding.  We are many things. We are OF many things.  We draw on those histories and traditions as a source of strength (and, sometimes shame).  But, even though I am all of those, in the end, I am uniquely ME, an individual that draws from the collective, but is not defined by it.  And, my friend, so are you.  

So the next time you catch yourself asking "how could a (woman/person of color/LGBTQ person) support her or him or THAT?" check your filters.  And so will I.  It's a start. 

What you don't know about military veterans (Part 1 of 2)

"Thank you for your service."

Conventional wisdom says conservatives are staunch backers and supporters of the military and veterans.  Liberals, not so much.  As a veteran and a liberal, I've got news for you. Neither side seriously considers or understands the issues, needs, or perspectives of those who served and continue to serve today.  And, to be honest, I'm kind of tired of the platitudes.

In the 60's, liberals were the original "Flower Children" opposing the Vietnam War.  Opponents of the war treated returning veterans shamefully afterward.  Three decades later, many Democrat officials opposed the invasion of Iraq.  Ironically, both of those actions have come to be viewed as historical mistakes, but that has done nothing to lessen the narrative that liberals are "doves" and "hippies" and therefore dislike the military as a matter of principle.

Even my fellow liberals are surprised when they learn that I have a long, multi-generational military background.  Sadly, this particular piece of conservative mythology has seeped across party lines to the point where it is almost universally accepted as true.  The truth is, red or blue, support for the military is more of a prop than a genuine, heartfelt belief.

There's a joke:
     "How many Vietnam Veterans does it take to screw in a light bulb?"
     "I give up, how many?"
     "You weren't THERE, man!"

In those three lines, you can find a whole host of lessons about understanding the military culture.  If you're not sure you should laugh or why, there's a reason.  Let's call it "Civilian Privilege".

You may not think of veterans as a "Marginalized Group" and I can understand that.  Veterans, by and large, have enjoyed special access to services, support, and recognition that many groups have not.  Add to that the inherent strength that is associated with the US military, and it would be easy to dismiss the idea of veterans as a minority or class at all.  And that's sort of the problem.

According to the Department of Veterans Affairs, about 7% of the American populace living today ever served in the military.  The LGBT community is somewhere around 5-6%.  The African American community is around 12-13%, and the Hispanic community about 17%.  Statistically, that puts veterans in a sharp minority, comparable with other protected classes.

Did you know that the US military has been in virtually constant hostile action since OPERATION: DESERT STORM in 1991?  That's 26 years.  Entire careers have been spent deploying from conflict to conflict.  Were you aware that there are still over 8,000 US troops in Afghanistan today?  Most people aren't.  That's because, in modern America, nobody has to sacrifice to support ongoing war efforts overseas.  The shelves are full.  There's no rationing.  And news cycles just sort of blow through periodic spurts of coverage when things go sideways.  We've got very short attention spans.  You can turn off your television, close your front door, and forget entirely that there is a segment of the population that has spent two and a half decades in harm's way, and that nobody comes home unchanged from that.  That's the very definition of privilege.

Americans are absolutely shameless in brief, shallow, pre-fabricated displays of patriotism and support for veterans.  We stick a flag out on a holiday, or post a meme on Facebook and call it good.  It's exactly the same sort of co-opting we do during Black History Month.  We talk about Fredrick Douglass, Harriet Tubman, and Martin Luther King for a week and walk away feeling like that qualified as substantive support and understanding.  Nonsense, right?  But, when it comes to veterans, we don't have that same feeling in our guts - that feeling of knowing that we are doing ourselves, our history, and our posterity a disservice by relying on token gestures.

So, red or blue, left or right, when people wave their little plastic flags and say "support our troops," in my heart of hearts, I say the same thing: "You weren't THERE, man!"

In Part 2, I'll discuss common veteran perspectives and how we can do a better job of actually engaging them.

Change, Fear, and the Myth of the Zero Sum

The conservative machine loves to call liberals "snowflakes" and "cry babies".  For some reason the belief is that we are scared of our own shadows, likely to melt in the sun.  But if you look at the politics of the left as compared to the right, it sure seems to me that the opposite is more likely the truth.  Based on the policies they are championing: CONSERVATIVES. ARE. TERRIFIED.  So-called "extreme vetting," a 2,000 mile wall, getting rid of all the "bad hombres," not to mention the inexplicable fervor to send our sons and daughters back into the furnace of war to obliterate an enemy that nobody else seems to want to deal with.  Everywhere you turn, the conservative media outlets are pushing a "boogey man" narrative that keeps voters coming back.

But our country IS changing.  Probably at a level not seen since the industrial revolution.  Our economy is transforming into the beginnings of what it will be over the next 100 years.  Old industries that were once the staple of our economy are decaying.  New industries are still finding their way into the mainstream economy needed to support them.  All the while, our demographics are evolving with them.  Baby boomers are retiring (or should be if they were able to save enough).  And as that generation slowly makes its way off the stage, a multi-racial, more diverse and socially liberal generation is on the ascent.  In short, the way we work, live, interact, love, and thrive is quickly changing in fundamental ways, never to return.

And, for many, those less equipped to join the new economy, to relate in a browner, more accepting nation, that's scary as hell.  It feels like the country is slipping away from them.  Then, add on the conservative media's constant whipping up of fear about terrorism and immigrants.  You're losing your job, your neighborhood is changing, AND they're all coming to kill you??!!  No wonder people run to the strong protective embrace of the right.

The narrative is a sham.  Seeing new trends and new faces emerging around you doesn't lessen your ability to thrive or pursue your own life and dreams in the same way you always have.  It just means people that choose to do so differently are likely to be doing their own thing in neighborhoods like yours. And terrorism?  Look, I grew up in Germany in the 70s and 80s.  Lybians, the Red Army Faction, and others were setting off bombs in discotheques and on airliners.  We didn't cringe in fear then; we faced them down with vigilance and determination.  That was the proper response to terror.

The underlying belief making all of this change especially frightening is the idea that prosperity and fulfillment in America is a zero sum game.  That, in order for some people to win, others have to lose.  That's simply not the case.  Sure, sometimes things play out that way.  But most times, in America, there's enough prosperity to go around.  We can celebrate Kwanzaa without taking away one single Christmas tree or piece of tinsel.  We can recognize the right of all people to marry without lessening the value of your marriage or anyone else's.  One person can make a pile of money and their next door neighbor can go out and make a different pile in a completely different way.  We are not a "zero sum" nation.

The narrative of fear is not going away.  It's too easy and too tempting to tap into.  Watch the coverage coming out of conservative outlets and you'll see these themes play out over and over again.  You can't reason with fear.  You have to reject it.  Face it head-on and reject the fear-baiting. And don't let anybody tell you that standing up for your beliefs (and the rights of others to live according to theirs) makes you weak.

Let's Talk about the "P-word"

No, not THAT "P-word"!  Although, given the way the national dialog has gone, I totally understand a more salacious assumption.  No, the "P-word" I'm talking about is PRIVILEGE.  And my friend, we're all wallowing in it.

Let me start by saying that this is intensely personal, not just for me, but for every one of us.  You may not come at it the same way I do, but I hope I convey myself in a way that helps you better understand me and maybe yourself too.

As a middle-aged, white, heterosexual male, I've found myself wondering what my place is in a liberal/progressive activist movement and culture.  How do I contribute to a cause where I look like the other team?  It's because of privilege that I know I HAVE to.

I have wrestled with this word a little bit.  I've never thought of myself as "privileged" in particular.  I come from very humble roots, couldn't afford college, served in the military, and have ground my way to the position I am in.  But then I got over the semantics of it and decided to examine the intent.

Privilege, the way I see it, is the state that exists for any person for whom, upon turning off the television or shutting their front door, a problem simply ceases to be.  It's not limited to "white privilege" or "male privilege"; it can apply to anything.  Folks that have never served in the military (or have family that do) but are advocating for foreign policy that might take us to war could be said to have "civilian privilege" because the sacrifice will not be theirs.  They can turn off their TV, close their front doors and the war doesn't impact them.

I was raised in a diverse military community.  I was raised to be color-blind and gender-neutral.  I thought that was the right thing.  But it's not enough.  Not nearly.  It took a lot for me to unwind the core beliefs planted as a child.  It wasn't until I started reading and challenging my beliefs with works like "Lies My Teacher Told Me".  These things started to open my eyes to just how our identity has been skewed by a Euro-centric, patriarchal dominant world view.

Don't believe me?  Okay, try this.  Close your eyes and think of that nice man who lived 2100 or so years ago and was crucified  by the Romans.  Go ahead - I'll wait.

Did you envision a caucasian man with noble features and reddish hair?  Yup, that's what I thought.  Now picture ANY famous Middle Eastern figure you can think of.  Any resemblance?  Our entire picture of the world has been filtered to fit a Euro-superior viewpoint.

Liberals, at the heart of it all, believe in and support three values above all else:  Equal Opportunity, Equal Dignity, and Equal Justice.  And liberals are the most open-eyed about recognizing where those values are in jeopardy.  It is those of us who are NOT impacted by a miscarriage of Opportunity, Dignity, or Justice who are privileged.  And we are the ones who must commit to standing side by side with the marginalized and oppressed until those conditions are erased for good.

We (white, hetero males) are the descendants of the architects of privilege.  We own it.  And we cannot rest until EVERYONE can close their doors, turn off the TV and rest easy in the same reality our privilege has granted us.  And, if that statement sounds like a hopeless cause and a heavy burden, then good!  That's the sound of privilege being challenged within ourselves.  And it's nothing - NOTHING - compared to what marginalized people of all types have had to endure in this great nation.